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Lesson One: Not Killing People
I swear... tell Jason he's not aloud to kill someone, and he'll give you a look that just makes you think he's saying 'foolish mortal, I shall live to be older then time itself and you're telling me I can't kill someone? HA! I feed on blood!' etc etc. o_o Gosh darn bird has an ego and it hates being told it can't just randomly kill people. So I've finally gotten Jason to agree to 'keeping your girlfriend and boyfriend happy by not killing people, especially with a car, unless out of self defense or defense for a loved one, or unless it is absolutely required for the bird like an urgent hunting session if for some reason your dear ol' staple *sniff* just isn't good enough.' But gosh darn it took a lot of negotiating to get him to that point.
Anyway, so Elza's built Jason a car, with my help, and now she's teaching him to drive, also with my help. She took Jason in to get a learner's permit but, well, he failed miserably on the driving test.
Me- So how did you do?
Jason- Well, I got through the first five questions.
Me- Oh good. So what was your score?
Jason- .....
Me- .. wait, when you say you got through the first five questions.....
Jason- I got all the way to question five.
Me- *thinking* But you. ........... you didn't get a single question right, did you. Dude, it takes five wrong answers and you already failed the test.
Jason- Well fuck them for having stupid answers.
Me- ... *forehead smack*
Anyway, so yea, Elza went out and got him a driving manual handbook learner thingy and we've been forcing him to study. He got through at least one chapter last night, and can answer a few questions correctly. That's... a good thing..... I know Jason can do this just fine but he's really being stubborn. Then again, Jason likes to just be a jerk sometimes. :) But at least I know that after enough negotiation, I can sorta kinda get him to agree not to kill people.. in most situations..
The bird, however, still has that aura of 'screw you, I'll kill whoever I want to kill' about it.
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