The sense of loneliness will fade, So dry your tears and rest assured.. [13 Aug 2003|06:11pm]
[ mood | content ]

*glances out the window, tucking my legs underneath my body in the chair at my desk and watches the raindrops fall from the sky rhythmically, listening to the soothing sound of them smack against the roof*

*turns away from the window and back to my journal, letting out a small sigh of contentment as I tuck a piece of hair behind my hear and rest my fingers on the keyboard*

Maybe I'm strange but I find something so relaxing in watching and listening to it rain. Kind of like nature's own music. *smiles to myself*

It's so great to have a little break from the chaos. At first I hated having so much time to myself but I have to admit.. *looks around my room at all of the familiar objects that I miss while I'm on the road, my gaze falling upon pictures of my friends and family* this is really nice.

*nods and hits 'Update', then rises from my chair and grabs my guitar, sitting at the little nook beneath my window, strumming my guitar softly*

Turn and walk away

Whats up lonely, Seems you're my only, Friend who wants to share my pain... [06 Aug 2003|06:34am]
[ mood | lonely ]

*Walks out of the gas station that is, thankfully, open 24 hours, carrying a blue-raspberry slurpee in my hands, wearing my favorite scrubby outfit: a pair of gray pants and an oversized Led Zepplin shirt. My hair is up in a ponytail, a messy one at that, with a few pieces of hair framing my face instead of neatly pulled back*

*Tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, looks up at the sky quickly, admiring how amazing the sky looks tonight, with the stars almost glittering against the black night, before walking over to my car and climbing inside. Takes a sip of the slurpee and puts it in my cup holder, starting the car and driving away from the gas station*

I've been driving around for hours. I can't sleep, as usual. And it's only my first day of a long break from doing shows. *sighs and glances at the clock* 4:17 AM. Nice. Yeah, this sucks..

But I've got a lot on my mind. I've been doing a lot of thinking.. *reaches over and turns the radio on*

I could stay lost in this moment forever, every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure-- *quickly shuts it off*

About that. No.. not Aerosmith. And not Armageddon or Ben Affleck, though he is cute. *shakes head* Me, being alone, has been crossing my mind more than I'm willing to admit, lately. *takes a deep breath* It's just.. I see so many people happy and head-over-heels in love and it would just be so nice to feel that way, too. I hate having that tiny, nagging, jealous feeling in the back of my mind that won't leave me alone when I see people in love. I should be happy for them. And I am, definitely.. I just can't help but feel a little envious.

*sniffles and blinks away a few tears* Wow, I can't believe I'm letting it get to me like this. *laughs softly* C'mon, Branch, suck it up.

Only problem is.. *bites lip* this time, I'm not sure it'll be that easy.

7 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

You're a bullet through my soul, And I'll never let you know.. [04 Aug 2003|08:22pm]
[ mood | calm ]
[ music | Goo Goo Dolls -- "Bullet Proof" ]

*climbs up into my tour bus, alone, and lets out a sigh of relief, thankful for a short break from my chaotic day*

*walks over to the small 'dining room' area of the bus and sets my drink on the table before plopping in the comfortable seat which resembles that of a booth at a restaurant*

So. New day. New city. New show. At the Gaylord Entertainment Center in Nashville, Tennessee, actually. Being here has suddenly made me realize that I have a thing for southern accents. *grins* How can you NOT like them? They're just so adorable. Not to mention how much more appealing it made that blonde guy who asked me for my autograph at the gas station... *smiles a bit and shakes head*

But seriously, the people here are so sweet. Everything is "Yes, Ma'am" or "No, Ma'am"... you don't get that kind of treatment everywhere! Especially not big cities like NYC. *laughs* So overall... I like it here. I might just have to stay here a few extra days, considering my next show isn't until the 29th. *nods and reaches over to grab my strawberry smoothie, before taking a long sip*

I'll miss touring once it's over. But it'll be really nice to have a little break. *yawns and takes another sip of my drink* Concerts, soundchecks, meet-n-greets, photoshoots.. after a while, those things start to get to you. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do, but sometimes I just wish things were a little more about making music and not so much about.. well.. me? *idly grabs the straw in my drink and moves it in circles, mixing up the whipped cream with the rest of my smoothie* It's just strange how to my friends and family, I'm just Meesh.. the dork.. but to the rest of the world, I'm Michelle Branch, the chick who plays guitar. *laughs* Though, being known for playing guitar is never a bad thing.

*gets up, drink in hand, and walks over to my bunk, kicking off my shoes before slipping into the bed to rest for a few minutes .. grabs the remote to the stereo, turning the radio on just as a bunch of commercials begin to play*

*sighs, hating the amount of advertisements on radio stations and polishes off the rest of the smoothie, slurping loudly once there's nothing but a few drops left*

*takes the now empty cup and shoots it toward the garbage. it hurts the side ofthe can and bounces in* Two points for Miss Branch.

*smiles and leans back on the bed comfortably, listening to the soft voices of the Goo Goo Dolls play over the radio, with full intentions of getting up and returning from my short break in a minute or two*

Do you listen to yourself.. Never live for someone else.. Do you like the way you feel.. Nothing hurts when no one's real

*nods in agreement with the song* Mm, amen to that, Johnny Rzeznik. *giggles and stifles a yawn, slouching down even further in the bed and closing my eyes, deciding that a little cat nap never hurt anybody*

Turn and walk away

Late at night when all the world is sleeping.. [31 Jul 2003|08:30am]
[ mood | sleepy ]

*Steps off the tour bus and glances up at the hotel which will be my new "home" for tonight, sighing*

C'mon, Chelle. Move it.

*Gets a playful shove from my drummer and I stick out my tongue, following everyone into the hotel, up to our floor*

*Walks into my room and immediately plops down in the comfortable black chair positioned at the desk where the computer is located*

*Hits the "On" switch before double clicking on the "America Online" icon and quickly typing in my password, reclining in the chair slightly, swiveling back and forth in an attempt to entertain myself while I wait for AOL to open*

I hate slow computers. So much for what my manager referred to as a "lavish" suite... nice hotel, crappy computer... *wrinkles nose as the 'Welcome Screen' pops up and pulls my legs up onto the chair comfortably, logging into my journal*

Arkansas. That's where we are now, for our next show. You know, I've always wondered why you pronounced the "s" in Kansas but you didn't pronounce the "s" in Arkansas. *giggles to myself* Anyways...

It's really, really early and I should sleep, but I'm not exactly tired yet. Which is why it's the be the perfect time for me to update. Just to let everyone know that yes, Miss Branch lives on. *grins*

I don't have a show to do tonight and to be honest, I'm not even sure what I'm gonna do to keep myself busy. I'll probably end up cooped up in my hotel room, slapped in the face by the realization of just how much time sound checks, meet and greets and things like that truly take up. O.o So if you see me online, please, rescue me from my boredom and talk to me. Make me feel loved! AIM: miss x branch

*Pauses and glances around the room, my eyes landing on the bed. Suddenly a wave of exhaustion washes over me and I yawn loudly*

Okay. This is me, thinking that the bed is looking a hell of a lot sexier than the computer screen. Good night, everyone.

*Hits "Update Journal" before X'ing out of AOL and flopping into the bed, not even bothering to change out of my clothes and quickly falling asleep*

14 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

I wanna be a Cowboy, baby [29 Jul 2003|01:28pm]

Houston, Texas. Yes, for another show.

*hums a little as I walk back to the car being driven by my drummer, carrying a paperbag full of Gatorade,Coke -vanilla, Dr. Peppers and water. I enter the vehicle easilly; the door was wide open for me, sit and put the paperbag down in between my legs. I shut the door and buckle up, opening the window and wiping a little bit of sweat from my forehead*

Hot. Very hot. *hears "Hot In Herre" being played on the radio, I roll my eyes and giggle, then look at my drummer who is now driving once again*

Perfect song for the day.

*my drummer chuckles and nods, he turns the dial on the radio and it now plays a song called "Crash and Burn". I look at the driver, making a face. He shrugs and turns the dial again, as it now shouts, loud and clear, a few quotes from the Wizard of Oz; "I'm melting, I'm melting!". I look at him once again and he looks at me, making a face, and tells me to tune the radio myself, at which I start fiddling with the dial*

*in the process of doing so, I hear the following tunes as I keep turning the dial- "In the heat of the niiii.." "I'm gonna soak up the suuuu.." "Hot... dirrty.." "Burn it up, burn it up.." "MUTHA F.." "It's raining men! Hallelujah, it's.."*

Okay.. *makes a face and turns the radio off, shrugging to myself and fanning myself with my hand as my other reaches into the paperbag and grabs a cold, icy drink* So much for fun in the sun.

Turn and walk away

If I could turn back the hands of time [25 Jul 2003|03:43pm]


*sighs and turns on the radio as I drive in the car, looking out at the sky filled with scattered clouds on this 103 F degree-d day, tapping the airconditioning controls as a Shania Twain song comes on, sounding somewhat static, as the radio's old like the a/c and the rest of the car*

So hot.. Very very hot.. the humidity's so.. there's no humidity. Water. *clears throat* Water. Must..have..water.

*shakes head and makes a turn, finally out on the 'big' Sedona road where the traffic's very light, I tap the a/c controls once again, sighing as a few drops of sweat build up on my forehead*

I need to stop asking my drummer to call car rentals for me. I always wind up with the worst cars imaginable. I hope he gets this back to that car place in one piece when I get back to the hotel.

*smiles as I let out another sigh, looking around at the familiar surroundings, those surroundings 4 years ago I saw every single day*

I spent last night at home. My mom made this huge dinner and invited some of our friends, we were all there. Dad kept talking about the furnitures he's built, carpentry's a new hobby of his.. *giggles lightly* He showed me a couple of wobbly chairs he made and this little coffee table that looked like it would collapse at any second. *smiles as the radio goes off all of a sudden, as it tends to do every now and then* Nicole's desperate over some boy at school.. David found a job. *stops at a red light and looks to my side where a truck's stopped too, I sigh, remembering something* I passed this place while driving that golf cart with my sister back in 1999.. January, to get to a nearby place to drop off a demo and picture. It seemed like only yesterday..

*bites my lower lip and jumps, looks up at the now green light and continues driving when the person behind me honks their horn. I shake my head and tap the a/c with the radio, and now some Mariah Carey song comes on, with more static than earlier*

Back to Pheonix. Show tonight. Yeah.. Two hours on the road and I'll be back. Good thing I don't have to dance..
Thank you Eliza and Keri for coming. And.. that person Eliza took along who wore an "Unbranch Michelle" shirt...

2 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

Everywhere you look, there's a heart.. [19 Jul 2003|10:03am]
[ mood | calm ]

*walks along the ocean shore, my hands in my pockets, the sun shining warmly down at me, little bits of wind blowing at my hair each time I take a step*

Yesterday I did that free show for Good Morning America, it was awesome. I had the rest of the day free, though. It's a rare thing, but I needed to chill out for a while. The shows have tired me out, they're really fun to do, I love doing them, but 'all work and no play makes Jill a dull girl'. My aunt used to tell me that.

*takes my right hand out of the pocket, raises it to push a lock of hair away from my face. A smile on my lips as I see birds fly just over the water*

Beautiful day here in L.A. Tonight I do a show here once again with the Chicks. I sent a couple of tickets yesterday, two for Alyson and Alexis.. one for Keri as Ste's in Liverpool. Um.. Eliza.. *laughs softly* I could never forget Eliza. Nick.. no, I sent him a couple but he's away on Honeymoon, I believe. I wish I could have come to the wedding! *grins brightly* But I hope he has a happy life with JC. I'll call him later.. which reminds me, I need to call the Toscos again.

*makes a slight face and looks around myself, finding no public phone in sight. I shrug lightly*

There might be a phone at the mall. I'll go to the foodcourt in there for lunch. Maybe I'll find a public phone there.

*sighs contentedly and walks away from the sandy shore, onto the sidewalk*

4 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

She'll have fun, fun, fun 'til her daddy takes the T-Bird away.. [15 Jul 2003|01:18pm]
[ mood | tired ]

*looks around the stage on this hot sunny day, sunglasses on and almost slipping down my nose. My hair messed up from the nap on the bumpy bus ride from the airport, I stiffle a yawn*

California, glad to be back here. I have like one more month or so to go until I finish touring with the Chicks, and.. I'm having the best of time with them, I truly am, but I don't think I handle waking up at 4:30 in the morning anymore just to go to the airport every other day, and bus rides every single day. Headaches are now my best friend.

*raises hands to massage the sides of my forehead clock-wise, earning a few quiet grunts from me. I stop and walk to a nearby drink stand and pick up a bottle of soda, unscrewing the top cap*

But anyway.. California, wonderful. Today the show's in Oakland, beautiful place. Tomorrow's show in San Jose, Sacramento the day after that.. and L.A. on the 19th. Speaking of which, I have free tickets for the L.A. show to send later on.. But before the 19th; on the 18th, I do a free concert in Bryant Park for Good Morning America. I hope some people can come on over if they have nothing to do..

*stiffles another yawn and takes a sip of the soda, walking to the hallway which leads to the dressing rooms*

The Chicks once again kept me up all day yesterday. Maybe Andy was right, I should have toured with him instead. *giggles and shakes head* But the Chicks are awesome girls, they're really energetic. It's an honor to be touring with them.. clearly, this summer is one I'll remember all my life.

*finds my dressing room, unlocks it and invades it. First thing I do : plop down and take a nap on the couch*
Free L.A. Show Ticket List: Alyson Hannigan, Eliza Dushku, Ste McNally and Keri Russell-McNally. If anybody else wants to come, I'll be glad to give you tickets. *smiles*

5 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

There's a burning bush to my right.. [10 Jul 2003|10:10am]

*takes a seat in the bus, stretching my arms out and yawning, my hair all messy; pointing to every direction possible, looking like some new addition to the Sesame Street muppets*

I think my cat nap turned into an actual sleep. That's the first one I've had in days. But anyway, we just left the hotel this morning.. and are now making our way to the airport, where we catch a plane for Vancouver. It's really tiring but as soon as we get to Vancouver, I'll have the day off.

*looks behind me at the Chicks talking together in their country accents, aparently about eyeliners and lipgloss, blinks sleepilly a bit, smiles at Natalie when she looks my way, shakes head when she offers to give me a makeover, looks back out the window at the scenery rapidly passing us by*

I feel a tiny bit left out here.. I'm no country girl and my accent's pretty normal. And I'm not a make-up person. Okay, I feel really left out. Well.. at least I got my laptop. I'll get on AIM later, maybe someone more like me will be on. Perhaps one of the Toscos.. or John. I don't know, I hope someone's on when I am. *yawns into my fist sleepilly, still in a dream-like state despite having woken up by the Chicks' conversation thirty minutes ago* Michelle's day off, wherefore art thou, Michelle's day off?

*leans my forehead against the window, my eyelids slowly shutting, myself slowly drifting back into dreamland, a place I haven't been to for a long while*

Turn and walk away

Mm.. taco? [06 Jul 2003|02:00pm]

*folds taco wrapper neatly into a square as I finish eating it, looks around for a trash bin but doesn't find one, is totally against littering so stuffs the wrapper in my back pocket, pats it, stands up and walks out of hotel*

Texas, hotter than ever. The food here -even hotter. *chuckles slightly to myself and folds arms, looking up at the sky, takes a deep breath, smiles and looks around* My manager said the bus would be here any minute now.. it isn't.

*sticks both of my hands in my pockets, waiting patiently. Seconds later two women and a man approach me, the youngest looking girl squealing a bit as the slightly older female speaks to me and takes out a pen and a piece of paper. She tells me how huge a fan of mine she is, hands me the pen and paper, asks for my autograph, and asks me to sing a bit of one of 'my songs', which she says is entitled "A Thousand Miles". I sign the paper, thank her, my own voice saying this inside my head to myself -"Humor them!". Smiles sweetly and clears throat, the man watching me dreamilly and the women too, not caring to look at my signature in which I wrote "Smile! (doodle of a smilie) Michelle"*

"If I could fall into the sky, do you think time would pass me by? 'Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles if I could just see you..tonight"

*the girls squeal, the man applauds, they all shake my hand and walk away, looking back at me as they do so, my bus comes and stops in front of me, the door opens and the bus driver calls for me. "Michelle! Miss Branch, hiney in the bus now, please" he says, the three "fans" look back at me, blushing and grinning guiltilly, I smile, stick my right hand up and wiggle fingers in a wave, I then hop on the bus and sit down somewhere, the three kids still shocked*

American Airlines Center, here we come!

Thank you Keri and Eliza for your generous birthday wishes. Much love to you both. *smiles sweetly*

10 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

Happy Birthday to me [02 Jul 2003|11:36am]
[ mood | exhausted ]

*opens Milwaukee hotel room door and walks inside, wearing a silly looking paper hat on my head and confetti in my hair, shuts the door quietly behind me and sits down on my bed*

Wow.. I'm 20 now. Wow. That's an age that starts with a whole new number. Wow..

*takes the paper hat off, drops it to the floor, doesn't notice all the strings of confetti of many colors in my hair, lies down and looks at the cards piled up next to me and the presents too, grins*

I'd open them right now if I weren't so tired. I mean, my band can party! *chuckles and sighs happilly, taps on a small box* Hmm.. *sits up once again and takes the box, puts it on my lap* I think I'll open this one.. *removes all the paper wrappers and the ribbons, lifts the lid of the box, takes a peek inside, slips a hand into the box and pulls out an Elvis alarm clock, pushes a red button Elvis' head, watches him shake his hips and sing "Jail House Rock", I giggle* Now isn't this cute? Hee.

*puts it on the nightstand next to me, sets it to go off at six thirty in the morning, goes back to the box, makes sure there's nothing inside and puts it down on the floor, along with the wrappers and ribbons, collapses on the bed and whines to self* Michelle..you..have..a..show..tomorrow. Get rest.

*closes my eyes and slowly drifts off to dreamland with all the confetti in my hair, a small smile on my lips as I dream of sweet things*

4 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

Deux mots qui vont tres bien ensemble.. [30 Jun 2003|10:23am]

*sighs, looks out the window as the bus quietly runs down the long, desert road. CD player playing Beatles cd in the backgroud, however very loud*

So, I stopped by Texas for a little concert planning with the Chicks and got a night's sleep, now I'm back on the road again, headed for Milwaukee. The third, I'm doing a show there.

*stretches in my seat as a small, sleepy smile appears on my face*


*tilts my head from side to side to the sweet, gentle beat of the music, sings along to it a little*

"Michelle, my belle, sont des mots qui vont tres bien ensemble.." *giggles and blushes a little* So Ste made me a little Beatle-manic today. Hee, I should thank him.

*sings along once again to the song as the bus drives down the desert road, the sun shining down on it and glistening off of the top of the bus*

2 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

Up, up and away... [28 Jun 2003|03:07am]

*chews on some bubble-gum nervously, looks around at the plane, the passengers and the crew in the cabin*

Planes. I get nervous on planes. Which is why I usually suggest busses, but this time.. the Chicks decide, not me. Natalie likes planes.. and they all love first class. For some reason I feel much more comfortable in economy.

*shuffles my feet together, looks up at the personal little TV monitor in front of me as it plays a movie*

The Charlie's Angels sequel. I wanted to see this on the big screen and here I am watching it on this small, teeny, tiny screen. And the remotes won't work so I'm stuck on this channell.

*sighs sadly, picks up a little tissue lying on my lap, spits the gum out of my mouth and into it so nobody else sees, puts the gum in a waste bin located right beside my seat*

One more hour to Texas. Relax. One more hour.

*hears the old man seated next to me speak up at me, telling me to be quiet as he is trying to get some sleep, I make a guilty face and whisper just loud enough for him to hear*

Oops! I'm sorry!

*he shakes his head and goes back to his nap, I look out the window next to me as the ending credits roll by on the monitor*

Why couldn't we stay in New York?

18 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

Just a day, just an ordinary day.. [13 Jun 2003|02:28pm]

*walks out of hotel, down the sidewalk, hearing random music from nearby stores, singing softly along to one which I happen to like*

"Open your heart to me, baby.. I hold the lock and you hold the key.."

*smiles and makes a turn, hums the rest of the chorus and folds arms, takes a peek at my wrist at the clock*

Yesterday, Justin's birthday. The kid has now aged a year, I can't believe it. It was just like yesterday he and his siblings met me. I didn't get to call him yesterday so I think I'll do that today and greet him Happy Birthday. And get him something when I meet up with him this week-end. Maybe Avril?

*laughs to myself and shakes my head and enters a building in which I am to meet with a few people*

I'm thirsty.. is there a store in here? Aha.

*spots a store with many beverages in many fridges and walks quickly in it*

Water! Oh, soda! Hee.

4 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

Under rug swept.. [07 Jun 2003|02:44pm]
[ mood | dorky ]

*enters my empty hotel room, plops down on my fluffy bed, picks up the guitar case which was lying around, unbolts them and takes the guitar out and positions it well, strums a few chords for practice, accidently playing the melody to a familiar song, shrugs and continues to play it anyway and sings along*

"Ooh, this could be messy, but you don't seem to mind.. ooh, don't go tellin' everybody, and overlook this sup-pos-ed crime.."

*grins as I strum on the guitar wildly*

"We'll fast forward to a few years later, no one knows except the both of us, and I have honored your requests for silence and you've..."

*stops when I notice I hit a wrong chord, tries to find the right chord and succeeds, giggles and continues*

"..and you've washed your hands clean of this.."

*bites end of tongue lightly, and playfully, as I finish singing and strumming, shrugs and resumes playing random chords*

7 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

Like Steve McQueen.. [06 Jun 2003|02:10pm]

Eighteen days 'til I open for the Dixie Chicks.

*grins as I lean against the bus, carrying my guitar case with one hand*

I did my last Radio Festival show for the month on the first of June. The next show I'll do at a Radio Festival is on the third of July, right before the fourth. Okay, that sounded stupid.. *giggles* Before Independence Day. And in the meantime, I'll be touring with the Dixie Chicks starting from the 19th of this month in Boston. The excitement never stops for me, does it?

*laughs softly, turns around and sits on the lowest bus step, the door being open*

And I will end the touring this August, and hopefully I'll get my summer break then. Fun in the sun, I can't wait. And, by then my album would have been released, I'd probably be releasing another single from Hotel Paper after that, although the first single isn't even out yet. I need to stop planning things that are yet to happen.. focus on today, Michelle.

*takes a deep breath and looks around me at the people running around*

I'm staying here in New York for now. My mother payed me a visit here, leaving my dad at home taking care of my siblings, they can't come visit me as they still have to go to school. I, however, have someone tutor me every now and then, just yesterday she came by. My tutor, I mean.

*stretches my arms out before me, gets up from the step and starts walking towards a building*

I think I should go back home before mama gets worried. I'll pick up some sodas and juice on the way home, my thirst is really torturing me.

*resumes walking, passes a few shops, a movie theater and some corner stores*

And.. "Everywhere", I hear, is currently being used in a preview for that Reese Witherspoon movie. I haven't been notified. And "Goodbye To You" is being used in the preview for "Two Weeks Notice" with Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant. Ooh, Hugh Grant..

*clears throat and shakes head*

An honor it is. *smiles* A really big honor.

2 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

Tell me what you see.. [30 May 2003|01:00pm]

*puts guitar back in its case, locks it well, sits up properly and looks out of the window of my hotel room*

Albany, N.Y. during daytime. I love it so much more than the night-time in this city. Even though people are not in their best mood this time of day, it's wonderful over here. The sun shining down on everything, providing just the right ammount of shade and the right ammount of sunshine. It's simply amazing.

*sighs happilly and takes the plastic bottle of juice next to me, unscrews the cap and takes a sip of the liquid, then screws the cap back on, looks around me*

My band must be getting the instruments ready.. I'll have to get going in a bit, I haven't had my lunch yet either.

*pulls both legs close to me and hugs them as I look out the window yet again, the cool breeze blowing gently on my hair*

My music video for "Are You Happy Now?" premiered on MTV a couple of days ago. I was really excited, it's very different from my past videos, the music is different as well as those on "The Spirit Room". I'm really proud about this video and the other songs on this new album. *remembers something and giggles* My mom called me right after she saw the video on television, and she was more excited than me. She also said I sounded like Alanis Morissette in the song, which I guess I did, a little. I feel like I've grown up as a singer, as a song-writer, as a person too. Mostly as a person. But despite my new, "more edgy" look and my new sound which is a bit more rock-ish than before, I'm still me. And Avril has inspired me to go for the new more rock-ish sound so I thank her. And for the video, I believe I'll need to hear opinions. Hopefully good ones, but I'm looking for fair ones from the viewers.

*smiles and sways back and forth on my bed, very slowly, still hugging my knees tight*

And after the premiere, I performed the song live at the MTV Beach House. It was fun, I think the crowd enjoyed the performance. Of course that is my opinion, and I was led to believe that they did like the show 'cause I'm scared to think otherwise. What if they hated it? Yikes..

*makes a face and shakes head*

I need to check if anybody reviewed the song or the video yet, I'm dying to hear opinions from people I do not work with or am related to. *giggles softly* Not that I don't appreciate the praises and kind words from my mom and my crew.

*yawns, blinks and gets off of the bed*

No time for naps.. I'm in need of caffeine. I think I'll go look for a coffee shop around here then get to practicing.

*walks out of the hotel room, makes sure I have the card key and that the door is firmly shut and well locked, then walks on*

3 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

Country roads.. [23 May 2003|12:47pm]

*sits down and puts my guitar aside*

So here I am in Dallas, Texas, getting ready for my show for tonight. It's a calm, peaceful place over here, I honestly am at ease over here. Excited as I may be for the show, I'm slightly saddened by something that has happened earlier this week. Dissapointed, maybe. No, hurt and pissed at the same time is more like it. I will be taking.. *sighs* ..a little bit of my time to vent, 'cause I feel I need to. Days ago, I got online as I had some spare time, and read something in the message board at my official site which just got to me badly. It concerns this person saying negative things about my music, not me but my music. First off, I worked hard on my first album, and I do not expect everyone to like it, but I do want people to respect me. I wrote songs on those albums, most of which was when I was 14 too, and I'd like to be given credit for that. "Hotel Paper might sound the same as The Spirit Room" says this person. And once again I don't expect everyone to like it but I do want people to listen to a track off of it and think "I guess she's an artist". All I look for is a little respect and credit as I said before. I write songs, and they all are things I relate to personally, and this kind of music is the kind I want to do, and it's like people want me to do these hooky pop songs.. I can do those, I tell you, but my heart's with the music I do now. That's it.. feels good to get that off my chest.

*folds arms, looks at the clock on the wall, shrugs*

So, the release date for Hotel Paper is approaching. I'm really looking forward to that, and the video for "Are You Happy Now" will be premiered on MTV in four days, and the day after that I do the song live. I'm a bit nervous I guess, I can't help but worry about people's opinions on it. It's hit the radio, I'm sure some have heard it, but I've gotten no feedback for now, and, being the curious chick I am, I'm in need of feedback. Hee. Well time's up for rehearsal break.. Time to get off your butt, Michelle.

*giggles a little and walks out of the dressing room with guitar in hand*

Turn and walk away

I AM happy now [16 May 2003|12:55pm]

*enters my dressing room, a guitar in my hand, alone, sits on a couch somewhere and places the guitar next to me*

Las Vegas. Finally I'm here. I have a show tonight, and I'm here at this time for rehearsal, after lunch. Lunch was especially yummy today, for some reason. I don't know why, but it just did. I have my show early tonight, then back on the buys, unfortunately I can't stick around as I would have liked. I've got to go back to LA later for two shows I'm having there tomorrow and the day after tomorrow. This time we're taking planes, yay! I got tired of busses and trailers. Hee.

*grabs a water bottle from a nearby table, twists its cap off, takes one quick sip of it and screws the cap back on and places the bottle back on the table*

Hmm, I wonder what people think of "Are You Happy Now?". It's been playing on the radio recently, not really a lot but fairly enough. Hee. It's also being sold as a digital single online, a full copy of the song. But, yeah. I've shot a video for it and it should hit MTV soon. Speaking of MTV, I'll be performing the song on the 29th live from MTV's Beach House. I'm looking forward to it. Also, I'm sporting a new hairstyle and all right now, hopefully I look pretty, hee, and hopefully the viewers enjoy my performance and the music.

*looks around at the empty room, hears the noise from outside the room, the babbles of the crew and staff, the banging of equipments and testings of certain musical instruments*

I feel bad, resting here by myself while they go through all the trouble preparing things.. I better go help out. Stay, guitar. Good guitar.

*giggles and gets off of the couch and heads out of the room, through the door and down the hall, looking for something to help out with*

Turn and walk away

I left my heart in San Francisco... [09 May 2003|01:11pm]

*plays the guitar calmly whilst standing on the stage during rehearsal with the band, stops when the lunch bell rings*

Thank God.

*grins all childishly, runs backstage and walks into my dressing room in which the band are all chilling in one corner*

*tiptoes to one side of the room where no one is, I spot a tray with sandwiches on top of a table, I squeal quietly and grab one, along with a juice pack which happened to be on the tray as well, then tiptoe out of the room, walk back to the stage, sit down on it and eat my light meal while watching staff and crew mosey around the place*

San Francisco, the city I love. I'm having my concert here in five days, and I'm so.. eh. Nervous, yet extremely excited. Haven't performed in front of people for a short little while, I love doing it though. *smiles and takes a sip of my juice* My album is finally done, scheduled to hit stores next month, perfect summer album. And "Are You Happy Now?", the song I chose to be my first single off the album has been playing in some radio stations every now and then. Some may have heard it, some may have not, but I have.. hee.. and I personally am proud of how it turned out. Hopefully people like it, I'm.. well.. nervous yet excited about this too. And this sandwich, too good.

*finishes eating the sandwhich, curls the paper wrapper up, gets up and walks back into the dressing room for more*

*tosses the empty wrapper into a trash bin and walks back to the corner with the food*

I'll gain lots of weight one of these days. *looks at the sandwich tray, all tempted to take another one* Well it couldn't hurt to have just one tiny little more. *grins, takes a sip from the juice pack and grabs another sandwich, then runs out of the room and back on the stage*

3 Pretend everything's okay » Turn and walk away

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