Megh's Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar]

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Does It Make A Difference? Does It Make Me Different? Does It Make Me Yours? [22 May 2007|03:44pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | The Vinyl Addicts - A-Train Serenade ]


1. Have you had a gf/bf?: time for love, doctor jones!!!

2. Have you had your birthday?: not yet....june 21st!!

3. Been to church?: yeah, a few times

4. Cried yet?: yes....

5 Had someone close to you pass away?: unfortunately. I miss you, Betty....

6 Pulled an all nighter?: a of a bio/pre-med student

7 Drank starbucks?: i work yes...lots and lots of sbux

8 Gone shopping?: yeah

9 Gone to the movies?: only recently....way too expensive up at school

10 Been to the beach?: i've been to THE SHORE multiple times already

11 Bought something for over $200?: I've spent over that, but not on one item

12 Met someone new?: A few someones

13 Been out of your home state?: I kinda go to school out of state, so thats an obvious yes

14. Gone snowboarding?: never ever....martha needs to teach meeee!

15. Made someone cry?: I hope not, but I might have

[[In The Past Month...]]

1. Kissed someone?: multiple someones

2. Slept in a friend's bed?: roomie cuddle time!!!

3. Snuck someone over?: ummm no not really. with 7 other girls, it's hard to sneak someone in

4. Snuck out of your own house?: when I'm home I just leave whenever. I'm almost 20...there's no more sneaking out

5. Been in a bar?: oh, Eastern Europe...many many fun times with absinthe and palinka and Hungarian creepers

6. Lied?: uh...yeah

7. Drove a car?: lots of times. i love my maxima!

8. Gone over your cell phone minutes?: not since my daddy changed the plan...yay!

9. Been called a whore?: uh all the time. but we use it as a term of endearment in 308

10. Drove somewhere?: many somewheres

11. Done something you regret?: yeah, but there's nothing i can do about it now, so why worry about it


Things you bought lately?: cute things from Victoria's Secret

Person you hugged?: My AnnieFUCKINGWilliams...I missed that girl SOOOO MUCH!

Person to call you?: Dan

Last time you took a bubble bath?: ummmmm a long long time ago

When was the last time you felt stupid?: today. i set off an alarm in Boat US with my parents. I was playing with the security thing on a GPS, not thinking an alarm would really go off. It did. And I looked like a fucktard.

When was the last time you walked/ran over a mile?: Walking to Blueberry hill with Jessimica

Who was the last person who saw you cry?: i really don't know....i think it was suz and kim??

Who was the last person who made you cry?: myself....eeeeeeeeemmmmmmmmmooooooooo

Who was the last person you watched a movie with?: Annielove....we watched Shrek 3 and it was adorable!!!

Who was the last person you danced with?: oh god....i have no idea....probably jess, while in my car, because we're awesome like that

Who did u last yell at?: probably my sister

Who last told you they loved you?: Jessimica

Who makes u laugh most?: Annie and her crazy stories and life situations...they're almost as bad as mine lol

What did you do yesterday?: woke up at 730 so i could be an aide on my mom's bus run and took the most adorable 4 and 5 year olds to school. Seriously, they are the most adorable things you will ever see! Then I sat, half catatonic, in the office and "worked": 10% speardsheets, 10% sleeping, 10% errands, 70% messing around on the computer. Then I came home around 4, texted some people, called some people, made some plans, ate dinner, watched some tv, and managed to pass out on the couch at like 9.

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Fate Doesn't Hang On A Wrong Or Right Choice [16 Jan 2007|11:52pm]
[ mood | content ]
[ music | Ben Folds - Songs of Love ]

Heyy kids. Sooooo it's 2007, a new semester has started, and already there is a CRAPLOAD of awkwardness to fill my days. Hooray for small schools...

But besides that, I'm much happier to be back at school this time around. Last semester was just terrible in many many ways. But I'm making sure this semester is a million and one times better.

And I am not one for resolutions. At all. Personally, I hate the idea of them. Like why wait for the beginning of a new year to make some sort of promise or change in your life?? Besides the point, I've kind of went against myself and made some "guidelines" for this semester/year/rest of my life...

Numero uno....fix whatever b/s is going on in my ridiculously mixed up mind. It's been going well so far, but I just need to keep myself grounded and focused and not be so goddamned emo this year. Boo that shit.

Two...cut all of this boy crap out. They suck, alot, and I need to avoid them pretty much. Well, not avoid them, but avoid the type I've been ending up with lately. However, when alcohol is in play, avoidance is priority number one. For sure.

And drei (yeah....i'm going trilingual today) about actually doing my work this semester and acting like I care about going to med school. I think that might be kind of important considering I basically fucked myself royally last semester.

Hopefully I can actually stick to those. They're kind of important if I'm going to remain sane for the rest of my life.

As for break, it was pretty awesome. I got to hang out with some "long lost" people. Best thing that could have ever happened, actually. And I'm getting started on a book of sorts with some awesome individuals. I guess you can call it a large collaborative project. I'm crazy excited!! The rest of break was great, Christmas was nice, and New Year's was fun and interesting and of course I made an ass of myself, but what else is new. Then I came back to campus a little early and I've been here since Thursday.

And as for Ursinus, my classes are alright this semester. Definitely better than the fall. By a long shot. Besides my Friday chem lab with Pfennig, an insane CIE prof, and godawful vertebrate bio, I actually enjoy my classes. Plus, there's a particular cutie in my vert bio class, so that makes it much more

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Against My Will To These Sad Shores An Unknown Force Has Drawn Me [27 Nov 2006|01:39am]
[ mood | sleepy ]
[ music | Deus Ibi Est - Isobel Campbell and Mark Lanegan ]

Ok, so it's been like 6 months since I updated this thing...not like anyone reads it anyway.

But whatever, I feel the need to write tonight...

So I literally just walked back into the suite and this has to be the last place in the world I want to be. It's great to be back with the girls again, but I just want to be home with my family so bad right now. I never thought it was possible to be this homesick when I'm only an hour away. Maybe I'm just so blah because I haven't seen them in so long. They pretty much ditched me for a cruise to the Panama Canal. Boo that. It was really nice having the house to myself though. People were over like every night, so that was great. And I got to eat Thanksgiving dinner with Rach and that was pretty fabulous too. But I just hate coming back to school. This semester has sucked so much and on so many levels. I feel like I die a little inside or something emo like that whenever I'm here. Ugh. I don't know what my deal is. I just can't stand being here anymore.

On happier note, I saw someone I haven't seen since the summer. It was pretty random. Very enjoyable, but completely random. I really don't want to jinx anything, so I'm not gonna say anything else about it.

And one positive about being back in the's after Thanksgiving, so it's officially Christmas music time!! Woot!! I'm gonna make everyone hate Christmas music in about a week. I'm pretty excited already....haha

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I Used To Wish To Be Back Home Again [21 May 2006|03:15am]
[ mood | content ]
[ music | Mona Lisa - Guster ]

I've been home for a week now and I can't tell you how happy I am to be back in Jersey! Real diners, real food, real awesome people....I've missed it soooooo much! I know come August I'll want to be back at Ursinus, but I can't even express how happy I am to be away from there right now. I mean, yeah I miss everyone that matters there, but I'm just so glad to be away from that scene. There's just certain people I would be so happy to never see again. But, because it's Ursinus and because I always end up in the most awkward social situations, I know I'll always run into people I don't want to matter how much I avoid them. Ugh. But that's something to worry about next semester...

And just something I need to ask/say before I continue....only drunk dialing someone does not constitute as obsessed, does it? I mean, if you rarely talk when you're sober, but call them when you're trashed, that doesn't mean you're madly in love with them, right? I mean, I don't think it does, but apparently some people think otherwise. Oh and last time I checked, it took 2 people to hook up. If someone I didn't want to make out with was trying to kiss me, I would just tell them no and stop, I wouldn't kiss them back. But you know, that's just how I would handle the situation. There's obviously people out there who disagree...

Anyway, I was back in Collegeville for the past 2 days. I had to work at Bravo, which wasn't terrible because I always have fun there, but then again it's work. Even better, I got to sleep over with the wonderful Ann McShane! It's only been a week and I already miss that girl so frigging much! And I got to work with Sam, my fellow Bravo Bitch. I love that girl too. She makes me so insanely happy!

As for the Jersey Crew, I haven't hung out with many kids yet. I went out Wednesday with some of my favorites and we did what we always do...randomly meet up, chill for a bit, get bored and go to Palace, hang out for hours talking to people we graduated with, then back to someone's house to hangout/drink/whatever. detox summer lasted me to Wednesday. Not even a week. That's pretty sad, but whatever. Then I hung out with Jessimica Thursday night. Oh man....we haven't talked in so long and it was just like flashbacks to Sophomore year while hanging out with her. First of all, we had so much to catch up on, so we needed one of our random driving nights. And somehow by some sick, sad coincidence, both of us were carless for the night. So we opted for wandering the streets of Gibby for a few hours by foot.

The thing I love most about matter how long we're apart or how little we talk, we always pick right up where we left off. I love having someone like her in my life....she'll always be my best friend no matter what and love that.

So yeah...that's basically been my week home so far. My dad somehow convinced me to work for him till June...douchebag. So it looks like OC will start after that, unless I can find a job there before the end of June. And I get to drive back into PA West Chester this time for Meghan Murphy's grad party. It should be a lot of fun. Apparently there's going to be a lot of food and a lot of "girly drinks." haha I love that girl! Then the day after her party, we're going to Sea Isle. I can't tell you how excited I am to hang out with my Grand Big again!! And of course, it's just another excuse to drink with my sisters. I love it!

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I'd Say I'm One Step Closer To Being Just The Where I Want To Be...Away From This Machine [19 Apr 2006|01:35am]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | The Compromise - The Format ]

I'm avoiding my I stole this from Lesley


Is your phone right beside you?: yeah, as usual
Do you have a bf/ gf?: no
Do you miss someone?: a lot of someones...I miss my Jersey Crew!
Do you have plans for tonight?: I did...I chilled with my favorite girls...we watched a knight's tale because I love that movie
Are you wearing chapstick?: nope
Are you cold?: my feet are freezing
Are you tired?: a little bit
Are you excited?: not in particular
Are you watching t.v.?: not now
Are you wearing pajamas?: sort of....just comfy stuff
Who's the last person you IMed?: Adam
Who's the last person that called you?: Nessa


Recently done anything you regret?: nothing I'd talk about here...
Ever lied?: dumb question
Ever stuck gum under a desk?: yeah...such a bad kid
Ever spit at someone?: hmmmm when I was little
Ever kick something living?: haha yeah....Dan Ventura in 7th grade...and really any other guy that pissed me off in junior high
Ever trip over your own feet?: plenty of times
Ever thrown up because you cried so hard?: fortunately no


Have any plans last weekend? none that were planned in advanced...just random hanging out
Who did you see most last weekend? the fam
Was last weekend interesting?: not particularly


Have you cursed?: better long was I awake before I said fuck?....about 5 minutes
Have you yelled at someone? fucking Pennsylvania drivers. Yeah, everyone here complains about Jersey, but lord almighty, where did you people learn to drive? I've been cut off and basically run off the road more times than I can count in the past 8 months here within 30 miles of this school. I've never ever seen driving like this in Jersey. You all basically suck here...learn to fucking drive and stop pissing me off!
Have you gotten mad at someone?: more along the lines of fed up and frustrated with someone....and then I let that out on the road
Have you cried?: nope
Have you called more than 3 people?: yeah
Have you IMed more than 3 people?: yeah
Have you eaten anything gross?: no....I skipped Wismer today

1. First thing you did this morning?: had a mini panic attack because I thought I missed english again, then I remembered today was COSA, so I had no classes, and I rolled back over and fell back asleep
2. Last thing you ate?: goldfish...yummmm
3. Is your cell phone a piece of crap? uh yeah...don't get me started
4. Do you have anything bothering you?: ummm yeah
5. What's annoying you right now?: a lot of, d-bags, being sick, etc etc
6. What's the last movie you saw?: A Knight's Tale! I thoroughly enjoy watching Heath gorgeous
7. Do you believe in long distance relationships?: well it worked for me for a little while, but it just depends on the relationship to be honest

Q: Is there a person who is on your mind right now.
A: sort of kind's more like a few people that are on my mind for different reasons

Q: Where is the last place you went? why?
A: Rach's room to watch movies with my girls

Q: Who is the last person you called?
A: Nessa because she wanted to know where the popcorn was in the room...loser

Q: Do you look like your mom or dad?
A: most people don't believe me when I say I'm adopted because I look so much like my mom

Q: Do you have any siblings
A: two brothers and a sister.

Q: Do you smile often?
A: yeah, for the most part

Q: Do you think that someone is thinking about you right now?
A: it's possible. I don't really care, to be honest

Q: Choose one to have (love, beauty, creativity)
A: love. above anything, love is all that matters in the end

Q: Do you wish on stars?
A: not lately...

Q: Do you untie your shoes every time you take them off?
A: rarely...I lace my shoes so I don't have to tie them

Q: What is the most disgusting food you've ever eaten?
A: basically anything in Wismer

Q: Would you kill someone?
A: I honestly think I'm capable of it, but there's no one I would kill like right now or anything

Q: Do you like your handwriting?
A: not's too sloppy

Q: Are you a friendly person?
A: for the most part. I find it funny that I'm so friendly but I generally hate people

Q: Are you keeping a secret from the world?
A: no, not really....there's at least one other person I've told stuff to

Q: Who's bed did you sleep in last night?
A: my own...tis comfy

Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
A: heather blue

Q: Do you have any pets?
A: well in my dorm we have a fish named Natalia...the thing won't die, I swear to God. It went the 10 days of spring break without food and it's still around. The last time we changed the water was after winter break. It's immortal, I swear. Then at home there's my brother's hamster. That thing is ridiculous.

Q: What is the color of your bedsheets?
A: brown with multicolored polka dots...I love them

Q: What were you doing at 9 last night?
A: in the middle of a Sigma meeting

Q: When is the last time you saw your dad?
A: a few hours ago...I was home for a doctor's appointment

Q: Look to your left. What's there?
A: Brendan sitting on Julia's chair and Ness "not sleeping" in her bed...and the rest of this room

Q: Do you own a picture phone?
A: nooooo

Q: Ever cried yourself to sleep?
A: yeah

Q: Ever cried on your friends shoulder?
A:'s the best when you're so upset

Q: Song that makes you cry?
A: I can't think of one offhand...but yeah. there are songs that remind me of things and they make me cry, depending on my mood

Q: Are you a normally happy person?
A: ummm, I guess so. I bitch a lot, but I'm not bitter about it.

Q: Is your self-esteem extremely low?
A: no, it's in the middle as of the moment. I have my good days and my bad days

Q: What color are your eyes?
A: brown

Q: Long or Short Hair?
A: medium...getting long...I need another haircut

Q: Current Music?
A: The good

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I'll Be Your Best Kept Secret And Your Biggest Mistake... [04 Apr 2006|12:46pm]
[ mood | refreshed ]
[ music | Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner - Fall Out Boy ]

Oh my god....I was such an emo kid in my past couple of entries. If I ever sound like that again, someone seriously shoot me dead.

So the bad thing about this past week is that I wasted so much of my time on the situation. Good news....that shit is never happening again. I'm sorry, but I'm too good and have too much respect for myself than to wait around for some douchebag to decide whether he wants me or not.

I'm not even mad at him to be honest...I'm more mad at myself for allowing myself to be that pathetic. Yeah, never again. Although I must admit, I really appreciated the maturity level by ignoring me and basically writing me off all the time. Yeah, way to make things comfortable. I thought the whole point was that we weren't going to make things awkward? Or did I get that wrong?

This shit in my life is ending right now. The guys at this school aren't worth my time or energy and I'm just pissed that it's taken me this long to realize that. live, you learn, you move on.

I have my girls and that's all I need.

FGSR for life!!

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Is This Real Or Is This Fading? [28 Mar 2006|08:03pm]
[ mood | calm ]
[ music | All Deliberate Speed - Mae ]

I am the most impatient person I know and it kills me to sit here and wait around for something to happen. And I don't want to obsess about it, but let's be honest. I'm a girl and that's just how my brain works. Overanalyzing and overthinking are like my job.

I talked last night for a while with Ann about a whole bunch of stuff and she really made me feel so much better. I don't know what I would do without that girl! I just can't help acting like a nutcase about this though. God, I become such an idiot when it comes to stuff like this.

I really want something to happen but I am so sick and tired of getting my hopes up on so many people. I just can't quit thinking about it, though. I couldn't even get started on my english paper last night till like 2:30 in the morning. There's something obviously wrong with that.

God, I hate how I think sometimes...

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No One I Know Is More Depressing Than Me [27 Mar 2006|09:11pm]
[ mood | blah ]
[ music | Tune Out - The Format ]

I've noticed something lately.....

I have a bad habit of fucking up anything good that happens to me.

Yeah, I basically suck at life.

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Cause There's No Love Like Apathy [23 Mar 2006|01:25am]
[ mood | okay ]
[ music | I'm Ready, I Am - The Format ]

I love falling in love with a new band.

And I love my friends...they make me the happiest girl in the world!

So there's a lot of random shit going on right now. Like how I've started to turn into a kind of girl I don't want to become. I mean like I'm obviously not over this and I'm doing the whole overthinking/overanalyzing/stalking thing I've seen other neurotic girls do in the past. I really hate it. It just sucks because I thought I was ok then yesterday something made me realize that no, I'm obviously not.

Hopefully it's just one of those feelings that will pass.

I really need it to pass because I don't want to fuck things up here at school. I know myself and I hate how I become obsessed with someone and then build myself up for tons of disappointment. It happens everytime, with only one obvious exception.

I'm not looking for a relationship or a replacement. I just want someone to keep me occupied, I guess. It'd be nice to like a guy that's into me too.

One thing that does make me Jersey kids. I can always count on them to say something to make me feel a million times better when I need it the most. I can't say it guys mean so much to me.

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I've Just Got To Get Myself Over Me... [22 Mar 2006|02:17am]
[ mood | exanimate ]
[ music | The First Single - The Format ]

I hate acting like I'm ok when I'm not...

I'm really good at it though. I had myself convinced for a while.


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Every Town Has A Diner... [16 Mar 2006|04:47am]
[ mood | sleepy ]
[ music | Wait - Death Cab for Cutie ]

Even more reasons why I love being from Jersey...

My initial plan for tonight was to drop off a shamrock shake to the love of my life, my Annie Williams, then hang out with the equally magnificent Jess Papa. Well, the shake happened, but Jess had an emergency of some sort, so we rescheduled, so that's cool.

So I sit through a god awful excuse of a McDonald's drive thru (fucking Berlin....can't do anything right), drive to Ulta, and end up with this adorable palate thing by hard candy. Annie is the best salesgirl ever! So then Ann's like hey, movies, come with, it's gonna be fun, so I do.
We hit the Ritz with her friend Nicole and see Failure to Launch...absolutely adorable and I heart Matthew McConaughey...then decide to see TJ, her new love, at PF Chang's. We sit at the bar and I have my first official meal there, which was the most amazing meal ever! And TJ was so adorable....he bought us wonton soup! We also got hit on by old drunk men, which wasn't so cool, but at least offered entertainment.
TJ then invites us out to a little gathering after he gets off work, so we're like yeah, awesome, let's go. We order food to go, eat my house, play with my hamster (looong story), and run to Annie's house. It's like almost 1230 by this point and Annie has to get in her house, wait for her mom and sister to get settled, then sneak out again, so I wait around till like 1 and we head out.
We go to the Skate Zone because one of TJ's friends has the keys cause he works there so we go to hang out, skate a bit, and just be ridiculous. Yeah, I was fucking skating at the skate zone at 2 awesome! And me and Ann had our dreams come true...we rode on the zamboni!! What What!!
We leave at like 3 after one of the kids does something stupid (never a dull moment around here!) then hit up Palace...of course. Where else would we go at 3 am? We hang there for an hour, and now I'm home.

So yeah, it's the random shit like this that makes me love my home even more. Always something to do, even at 4 in the morning...

And 10 hours spent with my Annikins is the best thing I could have ever hoped for!

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I'm Happy Because I'm Stupid [15 Mar 2006|04:52am]
[ mood | amused ]
[ music | Be Gentle With Me - The Boy Least Likely To ]

Just a few reasons why I love Jersey...


"I'm hungry" "Umm...we're in a fucking diner"

Jess stories

Water fight

Diner jukeboxes are the shit

"I wanna get FUCKED UP!"

2 and a half hours at Palace...a relatively average amount of time

"All I want is a shamrock shake! Fucking McDonald's!!!"

Making a retarted cake at 12:30 in the morning

Oh, Will Ferrell


Talking till 4 am about the good times, drama, and people that wound up as losers from high school

....Oh man, my Jersey crew completes me. Quite possibly the best people on this earth...

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You Can't Swim In A Town This Shallow, Because You Will Most Assuredly Drown Tomorrow [27 Feb 2006|10:51pm]
[ mood | working ]
[ music | Why You'd Want to Live Here - Death Cab for Cutie ]

I should be working on an english paper, but, yet again, being a procrastinator. It's what I'm best at.

So I'm officially a Sigma Sigma Sigma!! I was initiated Saturday morning and it was just awesome. I'm so happy to finally be a sister!

Other than that, I've been feeling pretty shitty lately. I really don't know why exactly, just really crappy. For the past 2 weekends I've wanted to go home so bad, but I keep telling myself not to and just suck it up and deal with shit. I don't know what it is...I just feel like people here just aren't worth my time anymore. Like there's a few people I thought I was close with earlier this semester, but this weekend definitely proved otherwise. I really don't know why I care so much. I guess I don't want to turn into that doormat that I used to be. I'm just sick and tired of being used and under appreciated and things like that. Certain people here are just all around assholes and I'm so mad that it took me this long to discover that.

I know I say it all the time, but really, I hate people.

Oh and what the hell is with guys thinking you like them just because you kissed them when you were both drunk? Ok I'll admit, you're cute, but please don't fucking flatter yourself. I was trashed off my ass, and so were you, and we just happened to be together and hooked up. Shit happens, but don't think for a second that I like you. The only times I've talked to you is when we were both drunk, so to think that I want to be with you is just a little egotistical to say the least.

And another thing pissing me off lately...stupid sorority bullshit. Yeah, I'm in Tri Sigma now, but does that really change who I am? If I hear one more girl say stupid shit like, "Oh, my sorority doesn't like yours so I don't think I can talk to you anymore," I might just punch them in the fucking face. Honestly, if you want to throw away last semester, be my fucking guest. You're obviously not worth my time because you're a petty, fake bitch.

God, I can't wait for Spring Break. I'm getting sick and tired of shallow people and petty bullshit.

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You're So Cute When You're Slurring Your Speech [23 Feb 2006|12:44am]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | Crooked Teeth - Death Cab For Cutie ]

Your senior year in High School is supposed to be "the best year of your life." Let's see how much you remember...

Who was your best friend?
Annie, Jessimica, Chrissy, Mal, Jess, Shmi, Julie, Shan, Jamie, Linz, etc etc

Who did you have a crush on?
Well I was with Jay, but I don't think you'd count that as a crush

What sports did you play?
None...only the occasional frisbee game

What kind of car did you drive?
My sexy Maxima! I love her

It's Friday night, where were you at?
Out with Jay, out with the girls, someone's house hanging out....all over really

Were you in the "In Crowd"?
I was more of a floater. I had a core group of friends and hung out with a lot of people

Ever skip school?
Uh yeah....the weather was too nice to waste indoors. And Six Flags is too much fun!

Ever smoke?

Were you a nerd?
I don't think so. Us AP kids were too cool for words!

Did you get suspended/expelled?
No....but there was a peer mediation with Harris. God that still kills me!

Can you sing the Alma Mater?
Uh...I don't even know what it sounds like...

Who was your favorite teacher?
Crozier!! That man is simply amazing! And Papa D is the cutest Greek man I've ever met

Favorite class?
Bio was always entertaining...or I was sleeping. And gym with Worth always made me laugh

What was your schools full name?
Eastern Regional High Schools...yeah, Intermediate and Senior count as separate because we're too cool for one school

School mascot?
Vikings! I still have my sticker on my car. I know...loser

Did you go to Prom?
Of course! Best weekend EVER!!

Where did you work?
My awful 3 month stint with Lone Star. Never ever again

If you could go back and do it over, would you?
Yeah, maybe. I'd change a lot though, like remaining completely drama free

Worst memory of senior year?
The stupid drama I got sucked into...totally not worth it

Last one, favorite memory of your Senior Year?
Prom weekend, hands down. I mean, who else gets hit by a deer in their limo, then takes said limo to Ocean City, and manages to keep your parents' trust after having 4 couples and 4 condos and a ridiculous amount of alcohol.

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How Much Longer Will This Keep Getting Stronger... [16 Feb 2006|02:05am]
[ mood | good ]
[ music | Definitely Maybe - FM Static ]

I have been in an extremely good mood lately. Don't really have a specific reason why, I just am.

Just thought I'd share that all with you.

I just hope that whatever is going on doesn't get weird like it usually does. That would be the most disappointing thing ever.

Oh and thanks to Annie and two are my best friends and I need to thank you for what you've done lately. You both mean the world to me and I'm blessed beyond belief to have you both. I love you guys!!

Yeah, I'm corny. You should know that by now...

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Oh Inconsistent Me....Crying Out For Consistency [14 Feb 2006|02:07am]
[ mood | happy ]
[ music | Let It All Out - Relient K ]

Hmm so I was kind of a bitch in my last post. Oh well, can't change how I feel.

So it's like 2 am and I'm still up, not doing anything in particular...

So my other roommate has a boyfriend now and she's been spending a hell of a lot of time with him. Hey, I'm not complaining because me and Ness practically have a double. It's just different, you know? I'm happy for her...they are so adorable together!

So it's technically Valentine's Day today and my first one in three years by myself. Ness, Katie, and I...and anyone else who would like to join us...are pigging out on candy and ice cream like all afternoon tomorrow. I can't wait!

It's still going to be weird. Like, I haven't avoided thinking about it, but really I haven't realized how strange it's going to be tomorrow not celebrating an anniversary. I know I'll be fine, but it's still really weird thinking about being single right now. I know it's just because it's valentine's day, so I'm just gonna surround myself with my favorite girls. And I think Jay is sending me cookies and that makes me SOOOO HAPPY! So yeah, I'm looking forward to a girlie night with tons of junk food.

Oh, and I have an addiction to candy hearts. It's really bad. But if you have candy hearts that you know you won't eat, send them my way. I'll take care of them, I promise.

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That Is Why I Want A Coin-Operated Boy... [12 Feb 2006|03:21am]
[ mood | aggravated ]
[ music | Coin-Operated Boy - Dresden Dolls ]

I just felt like venting a little something....

I'm done with guys.

I hate their games.

I'm just sick and tired of them

Ok, I feel better now. I'm not turning lesbian or anything, I'm just sick and tired of guys and their lame shit. If you like me, just fucking let me know. I don't want to be sitting around second guessing myself and wasting my time on someone who's probably not even worth my energy.

I don't want a relationship, but I want to know where I stand. Just cut it the fuck out. This whole "I'm oblivious" bullshit is getting old.

Oh and one other thing, I'm just done with you. Yeah, even if you do like me, fuck you. You obviously had your chance and you blew it because you're an asshole. Fuck you. You're a dick. I don't know how anyone could first of all like you, let alone stand being with you for an extended period of time. You're immature, constantly talking about sex, and just an all around asshole in general. You tell girls what they want to hear and get off by fucking around with them. I don't even think I want you around as a friend, you douche bag. So fuck you, I'm done with your shit.

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...I Was Never Gonna Leave This Place [08 Feb 2006|01:23pm]
[ mood | happy ]
[ music | Never Going Back To New Jersey - Less Than Jake ]

You all know how much I love being a Jersey girl...especially South Jersey, so here's something I found hysterical...
South Jersey Barbie

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I'm Falling Out Of Control And You Just Can't Stop Me Now [02 Feb 2006|02:07am]
[ mood | tired ]
[ music | Falling Out - Relient K ]

I've more drinking. For a long time at least. Thank God I'm pledging, so I'm forced into sobriety for the next 3 weeks. I just keep hearing too many forgotten pieces of this weekend and more for me. I'm done.

So tonight started awesome for me. Ness and I both got our formal bids from Tri Sig. I was sooo excited, you have no idea! I love those girls so much and I'm so excited to start pledging on Friday!!

But after that, everything has been shitty. I still haven't even started my critique paper. I just have no motivation to do anything right now. Then I was talking with someone online and a combination of mixed signals, high hopes, and then reality completely changed my mood. Whatever...I give up. Then, just because I love to torture myself, I read someone's blog and it made me feel like the most insignificant person ever. I mean, I have no reason to expect anything, it's just...I made me feel worthless.

God, why am I so lame?

So yeah, I'm not very fond of myself at the moment, or even other people for that matter. Ugh I hate this...

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Now I'm Aiming For Heaven, But Probably End Up Down In Hell [01 Feb 2006|02:42am]
[ mood | lazy ]
[ music | Rebels of the Sacred Heart - Flogging Molly ]

Yeah, I busted out the Flogging Molly today. They make me happy to be Irish.

I have absolutely no motivation for, well, anything. The only productive thing I really did today was go out to pick up a pizza. Then I sat my ass on the floor and pigged out with my roomies. I love those girls!

So this situation basically sucks right now. This whole break thing is supposed to be about figuring shit out but I haven't been letting myself do that. So yeah, everything that was going on....stops right now. This semester is gonna kick my ass if I don't start focusing. I got to talk with Annie today and that made me happy. I miss that girl more than anything! And....she passed her driving test!! YES!!! I am so proud of her! haha!

Oh man! I just remembered! Formal bids go out tomorrow night! ahhh!! I am SO EXCITED! Ness, Katie, and I are all pledging and it's just gonna be awesome! I need to run home tomorrow afternoon to pick up some clothes though. Long story. I get to see Annie tomorrow though...yay! So yeah...tomorrow should be pretty darn awesome. Ok it's late I'm leaving now...not much else to say anyway

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